Dealing With Toddler Tantrums: What Causes Them and What You Can Do

Dealing With Toddler Tantrums: What Causes Them and What You Can Do 

What is a Temper Tantrum?


Temper tantrums are a spontaneous and sudden display of anger. They are not simply an act in order to seek attention. When a child is having a temper tantrum, they typically cry, scream, and may even throw themselves on the floor kicking and yelling. They generally last anywhere from 1 – 3 minutes and can appear quite intense at the start. Dealing with toddler tantrums can be quite frustrating as a parent, but there are ways to deal with it.



Occasionally, some temper tantrums can be more severe and therefore last longer. The child may resort to pinching, biting, and hitting. These aggressive types of tantrums may be a strong indication of a more severe problem if the child injures other people or themselves.



Temper tantrums normally occur in children from 1 – 4 years of age. However, anyone can throw a temper tantrum – young or old.



Are Children Supposed to have Temper Tantrums? Is it Normal?



Most children display temper tantrums at one time or another and are for the most part considered common. As stated, the ages range from 1 – 4 years when a child is most likely to throw a fit. Some children are known to throw a tantrum every day.



What are the Common Causes of a Child’s Temper Tantrums?



A temper tantrum is a knee-jerk response to something that restricts a child from either expanding their freedom or learning a skill. A young child may not yet possess the correct skills to appropriately express their frustration and/or anger in a more suitable manner. For instance, a child may have a temper tantrum if a parent tells them it’s time to go to bed when they would rather stay up, or they are having a difficult time tying their shoelaces and their frustration gets the best of them.



Some children are more susceptible to temper tantrums than other children their age for various reasons. Things that may trigger a tantrum include:



– The age of the child

– If the child is too tired

– If the child has other specific emotional, mental, or physical issues going on

– The stress level of the child



The behavior of the parents is another factor to consider. If a parent responds too strongly to a child’s negative behavior or frequently gives in to their demands, the risk of a child displaying a tantrum significantly increases.



Dealing with a Toddler Tantrums



Simply ignoring a tantrum helps a toddler to learn how to manage their emotions more effectively. Pay close attention to what triggers the tantrum. Recognizing and identifying the cause of a tantrum can help a parent take action before the emotional state of the toddler reaches the point of no return and results in a full-blown temper tantrum.



If the child is age 2 or older and has several tantrums, consider using a time-out. A time-out gives the child a chance to calm down and gain control of their emotions while sending the message their behavior is unacceptable. Time-outs only work for children old enough to understand the concept of how and why it works.



Outgrowing Temper Tantrums